What Happens When Psychological Safety is Misunderstood?

I’ve worked with leaders who are eager to foster psychologically healthy and safe workplaces, but they sometimes hesitate. This is because they worry that their well-intentioned efforts might be misinterpreted or even used against them.

For example, a leader I was coaching wanted to create a more inclusive team environment. During a meeting, they relayed that they had made a conscious effort to check in with quieter team members and invited their input. Later, one employee expressed that being called on made them feel psychologically unsafe.

It’s a delicate moment. On one hand, psychological safety means we shouldn't feel shamed, silenced, or punished for speaking up (or staying quiet).
On the other hand, it doesn’t mean we’re exempt from being engaged, challenged, or invited into conversation, especially when it’s seemingly done with respect and positive intent. And of course, nuance matters. Every team, every conversation, and every person brings unique context and it’s up to the individuals involved in that dialogue to appropriately discern.

Generally, there's a difference between upholding psychological safety and misunderstanding it in ways that can unintentionally undermine healthy workplace norms.

In moments like this we can maintain balance by starting with curiosity over judgment, looking more closely at intent and impact, and having conversations that clarify rather than assume.

Here are a few open-ended questions we might ask leaders to better understand their approach (with reference to the above example):

“I noticed you called on me in the meeting, can you share what your intention was behind that?”

“Can you tell me more about how you’re trying to create space for different voices on the team?”

“Would you be open to hearing what helps me feel more comfortable contributing?”

Psychological health and safety is a shared responsibility. It’s upheld by the organization, the team, and the individual. If one is missing, the foundation becomes unstable.

As we build more humanized, connected workplaces, let’s give one another the benefit of the doubt, stay open to feedback, and keep showing up respectfully and responsibly, for our roles and for each other.